Sarah Rules

This guest post is brought to you by Cap’n John.

Ahoy, there be no law ‘pon the seas! For tonight, we three scurvy dogs - myself along with Cutthroat Claire and Murderous Molly - brought some massive pillaging upon this here ‘Burg. Yarr. We brought with us as our captive a young Greek who may have been named THADDIUS. Or Tim. We happen’d on a gathering of landlubbing revelers, procured some spiced spirits, and set to the task of pillaging the dancefloor. I myself came second in the “costume” competition (what costume? Yarr) and won myself some booty from a fellow named CADBURY. Makes confections. Avast ye!

The sea has never seen the likes of we three vagabonds!

Wardrobe provided by McSmitty’s Scurvy Duds.

I be saving this for me myspace profile! Yarr, I need to find a way to get more comments than Grey_beard!

And they say I’m gay.

Yarr, this be Thaddius. He may walk without peg and write without hook, but he’s got the salt of the ocean in his blood!

Thaddius crossed the wrong SALTY DOG when he remarked ‘Perhaps thy prodigious blade is a compensation for thine scantiness elsewhere.’ DO YE DESIRE A WATERY GRAVE, YE SCOUNDREL?

…

YARR!

When people decide to set of interesting sounding fireworks (aren’t they all though) they should make sure that everyone who can hear them can also see them as well. Otherwise it causes people to be upset.

So Claire’s friend was up from Londinium and so touristy things were being done. Last night me and John crashed one of these activites which happened to be A GHOST TOUR.

Hard core I know. We had to get to the royal mile for 10pm where the tour would commence from. After watching some almost too entusiastic memebers of the group act out a Scottish battle technique (all I really understood was you should shout loudly and be naked to beat a Roman army) we went to Grayfriar’s graveyard.

Now this was a pretty freaky place. The tour guide was obviously doing her job and making it scarier still. We were told about some guy who was evil and haunted shizzle. WHATEVER. It was plenty scary enough to necessitate hand holding and arm grabbing. We went into this pitch black tomb and were told to avoid cold spots and stories of attacks and the like. Once put in the mood, it was pretty easy to get us all to scream a ridiculous amount when a black hooded and caped figure jumped out at us just before we left.

Apparently the poltergeist that haunts that place gets to you afterwards and over 700 people the past 6 years have woken up with scratches, bruises, burn marks in the morning that weren’t there before. I’ve done checks, and none of us woke up with anything. SIGH.

On a less scary note (although the picture is debateable) John found some ammusingly named chocolate syrup:

TOP STUFF!

If you ever feel like typing Sarah Rules into a google search then I greatly reccommend it. It’s a fun activity for all the family. The number one result is, yes, you guessed it, THIS VERY SITE.

It does not however work if you type in Sarah Wiseman.

Yes, that last part was an obvious attempt on my part to get my actual real name higher up in the ratings. Here goes.

What? Yeah, I did just walk down to Tesco with only a Tshirt on my top half and yes a hat with a sunvisor was necessary. Thanks for asking.

You have no idea how gorgeous it is right here right now. I don’t even resent having to do a Logic assignment. I have the window wide open and sunlight is streaming in. I can hear birds singing (no chickens, hooray!) and everything is bright.

Awesome.

You know it’s time to go to bed when you start talking about ginger mystery solving dolphins.

Just a thought.